2013-11-01 / Columnists

Boyleing Points

Goodbye Media Coverage
By Kevin Boyle

It’s all quiet now. The rodeo has left town. Rockaway had its day in the sun as news teams descended upon the peninsula for the Sandyversary as a friend called it. I’m guessing The Wave has a photo of Chelsea Clinton in it – I mean, I don’t get why she’s a big deal. She works for NBC, doesn’t she? Bob Hardt of NY1 lives here and he can’t get his pic in the paper. Oh, Chelsea works for the Clinton Foundation – well, how’d she get that job? I’m not just complaining about Chelsea photo ops. I’m sick of seeing myself.

I was forced into being a media slut all week, appearing on all sorts of shows. It got so bad I tried to reach for some anonymity when I put on some grandmother wraparound sunglasses when I appeared on NY1 with Bob Hardt, George Farber and Terence Tubridy at the Bungalow Bar but anonymity isn’t what I got. I got unintended laughs for the attempt.

We were sitting facing the sun so the producer decided we needed some shades because we’d be squinting too much otherwise. Terence gave me a choice of two he had located behind the bar. I picked what I thought were the cool ones. Tubridy slid on the other pair making sure to say “Boyle picked the fashionable ones.” I totally believed him until I saw myself on NY1 looking like some cartoon character. Or like my mother on her way to the Golden Age Club. The camera doesn’t only add 10 pounds it adds layers of ridicule. Yeah, fashionable. Man, Terence completely punked me. I was the one who needed a Bar Rescue.

Boyleing Points: There were a lot of people scooping up extra copies of the Sandy anniversary edition. The Honans wrote in to say it’s a collectible so that means, don’t save it in the basement. If you got shut out of getting a paper, look at the bright side. You’ll be saving less crap. That’s what we all resolved to do, wasn’t it?

**Basically, a lot of us could rule the world, apparently. I was mentioning the long list of impressive accomplishments of someone. The listener was not impressed: Yeah, big deal. It’s because he has no effin kids.

Cold. So cold. But so true.

**Wish I’d thought of this. One of Rockaway’s low-key but smart observers is someone who goes by Rockawayist. In this week’s Wave he spoofs a soaring Rockaway real estate market. He suggests Rockaway Beach will soon be called RoBe. I guess FaRo can’t be far behind.

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